Roberto

Roberto is an employee at the gym I go to. He is from Chile and has lived here for about 10 years. He said hello to me in Spanish and I said some stuff back. We began talking in English:0 and I eventually asked him the question I like to ask people from other countries. "So, do you think people in America are more friendly or less friendly than your country?" I ask this because I felt that Costa Rican's were more personable in general than us American's. Roberto's response was great and it was easy to tell he had processed it in the past. He said,"It is not that Amercian's are less friendly, they are just more busy!" "You Americans have too much technology and it prevents you from communication." "You get in your car, go to work, get back in you car, into your garage, and into your house without talking to your neighbors." Wow, "This dude is on it," I thought to myself. He did not stop there. I think I struck a nerve or maybe a deep rooted observation he had processed over the years and never got to share. It was like an eruption of relational wisdom. "In our country we don't have all that technology, so we are dependent on our neighbors." "We spend time at our neighbors houses, we go next door to ask for things, we are allowed to cut through each others yards without being harassed." He said,"I have a neighbor who writes me notes on how it upsets him when my friends park in front of his house." "One note he wrote told me how mad he was that someone drove in his grass." "Grass grows back he told me, whats the big deal?"Not only is it not a big deal, his neighbor writes notes instead of interacting. "People in America have a hard time sharing and want to possess." I bought this house, it is mine, this is my property." I told Roberto that this is what we call entitlement. " He said,"Yes, exactly!" "In America nobody has time to talk, we have plenty of time to talk in my country, Roberto continued to tell me." I found this difficult to deal with when I lived in Costa Rica. There was an abundance of down time and people were generally content with just being around each other. I felt unproductive and lazy. It was too much for me. I told Roberto that I thought the Native American culture had family and relationship in general down better than most Americans do. I witnessed very easily and quickly that Costa Rican's valued their time with their families above money, status, or possessions. I don't think all Americans do this, but I do think Roberto has some great observations that I want to further process.